Monday, November 22, 2010

Zumba...You're Fucking Kidding Me!

Those of you who know me understand I have little patience for fads. In the health and fitness arena we appear predisposed to more than our fair share of one hit wonders, fads and lunatic crazes. One only has to view late night infomercials to see a plethora of ridiculous gym contraptions making even more ridiculous promises. By the way it always amazes me that in the US regulators crack down heavily on supplement label claims on the label but you can make any claim you like in relation to the efficacy of gym equipment like "ab blasters, ab swings etc".

Now it is my fervent belief that fitness fads are driven by 2 fundamental assertions namely:
1) 90% of people are lazy
2) 90% of people are stupid
Therefore brothers/sisters of the iron I contend then that a high proportion of the population that wants to get "fit" are too lazy to actually do the hard yards (squat, bench, deadlift and eat really clean) and too stupid to question the wisdom of a fads that promise great results. Thus we have the emergence of Zumba.

How this ridiculous dance craze came to be I do not know but based on the recent media saturation it is the current fitness craze of choice for the idiot set. So for the lucky few who haven't heard of Zumba, basically some latin numb-nut decided to carve his own little money spinner by combining Latin/world music with dance moves in an aerobic type class. So how is it different to aerobics...IT ISNT... its just the same pointless activity with a different soundtrack and tricked up moves.

Now how to spot the fad. Firstly heres an example of the questionable material coming out of various reviews of ZUMBA:

"Zumba toning blends body sculpting techniques...into calorie burning, strength training classes" Ok what the fuck is body sculpting you either gain muscle or you dont and the repetition of a singular body weight over time will not elicit strength changes and therefore not produce a significant adaptation other than to allow you to do more dancing. Will it build muscle NO, will it burn calories YES...how many maybe the equivalent of a 300g potato (400 calories) . So are you happy, given the finite time you have in this busy life to spend an hour burning the equivalent of 1 potato a session to achieve a result that will in no way resemble the skinny latin instructors you are trying to emulate.

Oh and dont someone write in to say I was this heavy and I did it for x amount of time and I lost all this weight.... horseshit!! If you did, then you my friend are the out-lier, the single individual on the extreme of the bell curve who would have had a better result had you had undertaken an intelligently scoped strength training regime.

What really amazes me are the articles that pander to the stupid. The review I am reading by Maya Anderson of the West Australian newspaper talks about the dance moves being "sometimes silly, easy to pick up and fun (now get this) with lots of hip movements butt shakeing and shimmying" which says in brackets is great for your core!!!! Hear that professional athletes, forget squatting deadlifting, glute ham raises etc all you need to do is bounce up and down on the spot to Latin music and hey presto a strong core!!

God can the general public be that stupid? Unfortunately the answer is a resounding yes and there is no greater evidence than the existence of "Zumba sticks". You will have to be patient because I am throwing up a little in my mouth as I explain this.  Zumba sticks are macarana type mini dumbells that vibrate as you hold them. The completely questionable suggestions are that this somehow helps burn calories and build strength. So, fixed weight vibrating dumbells are usefull huh....hmmm somewhere in Arlington Texas Ronnie Coleman has woken up screaming!!

I have also noticed that the hook that really traps the masses is the contention that it is fun..not awful hard boring training. Hmmm how great is that. I must remind my local football team that they can get rid of their highly periodised pre-season "difficult boring" routine and just take up Zumba.

So to recap let me be very clear. If your goal is to change your physique to look more athletic and muscular in the shortest possible time then you need to weight train intelligently on brief basic full body routines with a clean diet. If however you are bored of online dating, generally lazy, have the attention span of a goldfish and love Latin music then sign up for as many Zumba classes as you can. Oh and perhaps shove one of those Zumba sticks in your mouth while your at it, its about the only way Zumba sticks could assist with calorie restriction!

What I find most troubling about Zumba is it perpetuates the myth that traditional training that is hard and painful is to be avoided. Bottom line the average body prefers homeostasis and therefore requires a herculean effort to change. This should be embraced as those of you out there involved in old school training know there is no greater satisfaction than a hard session in the gym with the unforgiving Iron.

My parents generation knew the value of hard work and that anything gained with ease was often not the panacea it was purported to be. While my tongue is firmly planted in my cheek the advent of fads like Zumba diminish us all.

Thomo

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

You Have to Monitor and Track Your Progress - Part 2

In part 1) I outlined that one of the key metrics to monitor progression must be an objective tracking of bodymass changes. In part 2 I want to outline how I track other key metrics: such as strength and general health indicators.

I should reiterate I am natural, don't get me wrong I have no issue with medically supervised test replacement therapy. However my levels are in the mid range and I am not close to my genetic potential despite being the wrong side of thirty.In addition have less than stellar genetics for this sport.  Regardless, I am in for the long haul and I don't know about you but my time is far too precious to be wasted, so you must monitor and track to ensure you are getting reward for your endeavours.

The second key indicator to monitor is strength. There is overwhelming evidence to suggest that a natural trainer cannot hope to get bigger without getting stronger. This is especially true for those of you commencing your lifting career. Now not everyone is going to be a powerlifter like Ted Arcidi or Mike Bridges, but as my old coach says everyone has the genetic capacity to become considerably stronger than your current level. I remember in the early days reading Stuart McRoberts hardgainer columns in Iron Man (or was it Randall J Strossens columns?!) and one point he made was that every natural trainer should aim for a 300pound bench 400 pound squat and a 500 pound deadlift. This concept however remote it appeared at the time has stayed with me. What I have learnt over the years is the only real impediment to achieving this is stupidity and a general lack of patience.

So how do I monitor my strength. Well I am a devotee to Rippetoes basic strength methods as outlined in his excellent book "Starting Strength". That means I train 3 days a week on a basic template with a linear progression. I wont repeat verbatim the training template as Ripps book and website do much better justice than I can . However the salient points are as follows. I perform a maximum of 4 exercise on a full body routine focusing on Deadlift (my long arms finally come in handy given I am a foot to short to be drafted in the NBA!) squat, bench, military press and chin. For all,other than the deadlift I stick to 3 sets of 5 at the same weight.

Progression is ridiculously simple. I started at 60% of my 1 rep maximums (tested, though you can estimate of your best 5RM or 3RM using downloadable max reps calculators). Per Ripps program I then add 5-10 pounds at each session. The underlying principle is to use the constant volume of 3 sets to stay within yourself but continue to increment on a session by session basis. More finesse is required to manage an intermediate or advanced trainee (drop me a query if you want some assistance and dont have Ripps great book practical programming) though the principle remains the same.

Importantly this type of program forces you to focus on constant progression and move away from working to failure. I learned through monitoring my progress that I am very sensitive to working to failure. This is a combination of my genetics and lifestyle. My vocation is a reasonably stressful environment with significant time demands. Therefore for me a routine that requires even 1 or two sets to failure wipes me out and sends me into over-training and wasted time

My routine forces me to  increase weight moderately but regularly which overtime will and has resulted in strength gains.  Significantly this changes the nature of training. Rather than a random session of "going for the pump" or haphazardly incrementing in a pyramid fashion I am hitting targets set by set session by session and never missing targets reps. Critically I annotate every workout and note also relatively how I  felt on each set. Oh and for fuck sake a spotter is only, repeat only to lift out the bar and rack it back in safely.

Using these methods I know after every session how my strength is tracking and at the end of every cycle I can estimate my increase in 1 rep maximum. The next important metric or set of metrics are the ones you all are least likely to care about or even bother with. But I cannot emphasise how important it is early on in your career to get annual blood work done, at least annually. By this I mean the full panel, cholesterol, test, cortisol, liver, glucose etc. There are plenty of articles on the net to indicate what you should test. Now for those of you in the USA where the general level of health cover is shit I would suggest stop spending money on useless fucking pre-workout formulas and top of the range protein powders. Buy the basics and ditch the rest, the money you save can be put into paying for blood work.

If I could go back and do one thing it would be to get 6 monthly blood work done from the age of 20 or so. Building up a baseline early in life and then monitoring general health as you train is so important. In fact it helps highlight the positive effects your lifting will have on your health and ensure you identify any aberrations early. Oh and for those of you juicing if you aren't under medical care and getting blood work quarterly then you are as dumb as a Sarah Palin sound bite...so get your self tested.

Alright lets summarise the key points from part 1 and 2:
1) Track your lean muscle mass and fat mass
2) Try a Rippetoe routine or similar that relies on increasing your strength
3) Finally get a baseline of your overall health through blood work and monitor it at least annually, preferably 6 monthly.

These 3 principles applied judiciously and with patience should add significant value to even the hardest gainer.  Drop me a line if you want to find out more detail.

Cheers for now Thomo

Sunday, November 14, 2010

You Have to Monitor and Track your Progress – Part 1

How do you train? Are you a devotee of Westside, HIT, Dogcrapp or old school Rippetoe? A cursory flick through the pages of Muscular Development and Iron Man magazine reveal a multitude of routines and systems. Point of fact there are as many systems as there are trainees. How then do you choose?

Forget the routine for a minute it is the method used to measure its efficacy that is important. Like most of you my goals are elegantly simple, gain muscle, lose fat and get stronger.  The achievement of these goals requires the management of many modalities. You must train hard, increase weight on a session by session basis, sleep well and recover. However these are the “what” the key things you must do to gain. How “well” you execute them is revealed by the progress you make. Therefore measuring your performance during your training cycle is fundamental to success.

The physical manifestation of a successful program is borne out in the changes to your physique. You must measure these numbers regularly and be rigorous in your approach. This adherence to measurement was drilled into me by my coach and is the most important adjunct in your training program.

My own approach is simple and might illustrate how easy it is to drive real improvement in your own program. Firstly at the commencement of each cycle I have a Dexa scan performed at my local health facility. Dexa scans are the gold standard in measurement of body mass. For $100 and ten minutes of my time I receive a highly accurate measure of fat mass, muscle mass and bone density. This scan begins a training cycle and becomes the baseline against which all of my progress will be measured. On a weekly basis I will monitor my weight fluctuation via the scale and two weekly via electronic callipers. Ultimately, it is the comparison of numbers on a second scan performed at the end of a quarterly training cycle that will prove the efficacy of my routine.

An adherence to numbers mitigates the typical human response to overestimate changes to the body and underestimate the effort required to effect those changes.
Too often do I see guys in my gym performing random movements based purely on how they feel or worse what the "think" needs work. They never change their routine because they simply don’t realise it isn’t working and they don’t realise it’s not working because they don’t measure and they don’t monitor. Before you ask jumping on the scales won’t cut it. Too often fat gain from loose diets is mistaken for progress and justified by the old chestnut “bulking up”! What is the net result? These guys don’t gain and they don’t know they aren’t gaining because they never measure accurately their response to training.  

Accurately measuring performance yields results. I have gained 7.5 kilo's of pure muscle and made great increases in my deadlift, squat and bench during  my last training cycle. Importantly I have continued to learn what works for me in the gym and what is extraneous to my quest for progress none of which would be evident without accurate tracking.

In this post I have focussed only on one outcome measure: tracking body mass. The same rigour must be applied to your routine, sets, reps and weight. In part 2 I will outline how I manage these modalities and the benefits of old school full body training.

Thomo

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Old School Bodybuilding - Shout out to Queensland Uni!

While sojourning in Brisbane I have struggled to find a decent gym. I would normally book one to one sessions with my coach Damon at his great facility in Fortitude Valley, however for the last 5 weeks I have been going old school with a Mark Rippentoe routine from Starting Strength to work on my form and manage some issues I am having with recovery (subject of a new blog next week). Therefore finding a gym with power racks and the ability to powerclean was a priority.

I have already blogged on my disastrous workout at Fitness First so following a google session and spotting a positive forum review on the University of Queensland gym I caught a ferry to the St Lucia campus and hoped for the best.

Upon arrival I paid $14 for a casual session. Staff were very friendly and the change rooms large and spacious including automated lockers for casual users. Based on my first look, the gym occupies a corner of the sports centre building which spans several levels. First level...nothing but machines, granted all quite new but not what I needed. I descended to ground floor, a few benches, plenty of gear for free weight shoulders back etc but no racks and nowhere to clean. Anxiety is starting to rise and at this point I am starting to worry my 30 min ferry ride and 14 bucks were for nothing. Then I spot stairs up to a third level and......nirvana!!!

The third level has 3 power racks, couple of benches, a solid t-bar row unit, prone row, plenty of great condition rubberised dumbbells and an adjustable chin and dip bars! Rounding the corner I couldn't conceal the stupid smile that splayed across my face: I was looking at 3 genuine Olympic lifting platforms with a full range of rubber plates for Olympic lifting and more importantly for my power cleans. Like a pig in the  proverbial shit I hit the iron with a vengeance erasing the memory of my horrendous workout at fitness first.

 As a University campus most of my fellow lifters were in their early twenties. Now not withstanding the usual array of poor form and confused exercise execution the overall vibe was of hard training kids giving it their best. I spotted a kid dumbell benching 40kg dumbells and then another couple of guys giving 100kg benches their best shot. As I deadlifted 2 Asian students were clean and snatching next to me and working really hard on their form. Importantly no obvious sign of using (roids) and no one was fucking around with biceps or triceps. It was genuinely old school hardcore heavy (relatively) compound exercises being lifted by kids in their prime. They probably dont have much sense but plenty of recovery ability and a really obvious desire to lift heavy. 

The Queensland Uni gym certainly was a more enjoyable facility than my regular diggs in Perth. Comparatively the vibe of the young kids here exceeded what I am used to at home. In my gym there are a number of young guys barely lifting 2 wheels on bench and not deadlifting/squating at all. Worse still  too many of the young guys are just not training hard and already are dabbling in the gear. These guys could learn a hell of a lot from the crew at Queensland Uni!!

Suffice to say it was a fantastic experience. I was genuinely inspired and felt a little pang of jealously at these young kids just starting out on their journey in life and with the iron.

Thomo

Monday, November 1, 2010

Commercial Gym Chains - ARGGHHHHHHHH!

I am currently on vacation staying in Brisbane on the east coast of Australia. Therefore I am approximately a 5hour flight from my home town of Perth and more disconcertingly 5 hours from my gym. Running late today (funny how one can run out of time doing nothing on a vacation) I had to make the choice between not working out or braving the local national fitness chain (Fitness First). For those of you located in the US this chain is scarily similar to planet fitness in the US though thankfully without the lunk alarm (so far!). Conceptually this chain caters for those not interested in working out properly or who dont want to feel discomfort or effectively those that dont actually want results!

Four hours later I am still in shock at the affront to common sense I witnessed while trying to manfully complete a basic hard and heavy Rippentoe workout. I will try and articulate my brief journey to the twighlight zone.

After signing in and handing over $22 I made my way to the weights area: carefully navigating past an anorexic blonde in full boxing kit sparring with a PT (personal trainer), a spin class in the dark?!? and the obligatory and dizzying array of cardio equipment.  When I finally reached the weight area 3/4 of the space was taken up by plate loading machines while what free weights I could locate were crammed into the small remaining space.

Crazy shit no.1
There are at least 8 PT's on the floor. One guy is helping a clearly out of shape asian student by giving him forced reps on every set and the PT is clearly doing all of the lifting. Note each PT is resplendent in tight polo shirts and giving the standard "high five" and "maaaate!" to everyone within 5 meters. Actually stay tuned I am sure in the near future they will give the  high five a technical name and have everyone performing it on a bosu ball,shit they will probably hold classes! The creepiest thing is that everyone is smiling, doing predominately isolation exercises and clearly not working hard. Its a little reminiscent of a cult only instead of praying to a god they are preying to the great spandex god of stupidity.

Crazy Shit no.2
There is only 1 squat rack and one bench press, your fucking kidding me!!!

Crazy Shit no.3
Everyone is doing really strange variations of exercises. I noticed at least 3 guys doing lateral raises but performing them while rotating their trunk from one side to the next. It looked like they were trying to perform a lateral raises in slow motion and combine it with a twist for serratus and obliques. Really weird!

Crazy Shit no.4
You know the next one dont you? Bosu ball, yes it wouldn't be a fucked up national chain if every second exercise wasn't performed on a Bosu ball. So I am trying to knock out ass to the ground squats and jammed up next to me is some nutter doing one single arm presses while half squatting up and down on a bosu ball. Not far behind is some other wacko doing one legged squats on one. So tell me what activity do these guys undertake outside of the gym that requires them to balance like that?????  Oh and you know that the most popular piece of kit was the cable cross over. Oh yes at least 6-7 guys were lining up to really "fry" their pecs with that useless piece of shit.

Crazy Shit 5.
No one knows how to spot. I am benching for my second exercise and because I am at an unfamiliar gym I ask for a spot to ensure no hiccups. By this I mean a lift off and then dont touch the fucking bar until I re rack it. Now I thought I clearly explained this to the guy spotting me but something was lost in translation because the next thing I know "Mr Compression shirt" (dont get me started on this) tries to upright row my bench off me every fucking time my bar speed slows...serenity now serenity now!!!

Overall it was the worst training environment I have ever experienced. Lots of young guys without a clue and no one working hard. I understand how these gyms make their money, people are given such shit advice that no one has any chance of improving their physique so these poor half wits keep turning up and making zero progress. Truly truly horrible and now I know what guys in the US experience when they train at places like planet fitness.

Avoid these places like the plague they are an anathema to hard training and cater to the average uninformed fool who doesnt want to work hard and if they do they'd rather aerobacise themselves into oblivion.

Thomo